I looked at and seriously considered several very cool cars in my search. At the end of the day, it all pointed back towards a Tesla. I liked the compact cars for their price and my ability to keep my Challenger, but the range was a serious issue. I liked the mid-range hybrids, but they just aren’t exciting, and I wanted an EV again. The higher-end cars were very cool (I’ve always wanted an S-Class), but most weren’t practical as EVs and didn’t offer the value a Tesla offered. The Model 3’s had just started to roll out at the time, but I couldn’t get the same value for a new Model 3 as I could for a used Model S. Also, at the time, they were experiencing a lot of quality control issues with the Model 3 deliveries. At the end of the day, the Tesla Model S won out! Now, a new series of decisions and problems developed…which Tesla Model S…and also, perhaps most importantly, how to convince my wife.


Getting Permission
When I first brought up the half-baked idea of replacing and/or augmenting the Challenger or Dart, she was not a fan. I can’t blame her. We’re a house with 2 people, 3 cars, a motorcycle, and a dachshund- we just don’t need anymore means of transportation. My wife also had a special attachment to the Challenger because we’d made so many memories in the car. I unabashedly showed it off on our first date, and we’d taken the car on many road trips over the years. I had told her about the idea months ago, before starting all the preceding research. Now, I was 80% of the way towards a final decision, and it was time to update her on my goofy project. I would have to put together a solid strategy, something irrefutable, something logical, something that… allowed me to buy an expensive and wildly unnecessary car. The odds were not in my favor.
Stacking the Deck
She had wanted me to get a 4-door for a while, so I had that in my corner. For years, I’d made the argument that the Chally could easily fit car seats in the back if needed, but I was never taken very seriously for some reason. I also protested that the Dart was a 4-door, but the lack of seat belts and other basic safety equipment consistently worked against me. I contended that you would be perfectly safe in the Dart during an accident because of its mass and unforgiving steel construction; you’d simply obliterate anything you ran into, leaving the passengers unscathed. So, it’s a 4-door. That’s the entire list of immediate and obvious pro’s. It would be an uphill battle.
I’m not a dirty hippy by any means, but the environmental impact of driving my gas guzzler was always in the back of my mind. I knew my wife would support that angle, so that worked in my favor. I always had an issue with driving my beautiful orange shoebox every day for cost reasons, so I knew my wife would support the decision from a cost perspective. I knew the cost savings associated with decreased/zero fuel consumption would also be a big selling point, but it wasn’t just her I had to sell. I also had to sell myself on the idea of going from no car payment to a big fat ugly car payment.
Addition by Subtraction
As a finance/accounting nerd, I donned my cape, put on my green visor, and immediately started compiling an overly complicated spreadsheet that would impress and overwhelm my wife. First, I laid out the Challenger expenses, including fuel, maintenance, and insurance, and added it all up. Fuel was the most significant expense, followed by maintenance. Why maintenance, you ask? Excellent question. Unfortunately, my tire budget was quite expensive. For some unknown and unforeseeable reason, the rear tires tended to wear out very quickly.
I also went ahead and laid out two different Tesla scenarios, one for an S85 and one for a P90D with Ludicrous mode (P90DL). At the time, the price difference was about that of a new Kia, so I wanted to see how both played out in a monthly payment. The difference in monthly payment between the two Tesla Models was huge. I ran the numbers several times and tried different scenarios until I arrived at something I felt was fair. Not only was either Tesla expensive, but they were both a lot more than gas and my tire-smoking habit. Like I said, it wasn’t just my wife I was trying to convince.
Between the crazy high cost of the payments on the Tesla and crazy high insurance costs, the P90DL cost twice as much as the all-in costs on the Chally. Thankfully, the S85 only cost 50% more than keeping the Challenger. So, the math wasn’t really going to work out on the P90DL. I thought about it some more and realized I really didn’t need my motorcycle anymore. That’s another story I’ll post about in the future, but I originally bought my Triumph to navigate a 40-mile commute through LA traffic. However, I had recently changed jobs and didn’t need my motorcycle for the commute anymore. I financed the bike when I bought it because interest rates were so low, so it meant I could keep the cash and invest it. Saying goodbye to my bike would free up a payment, expensive maintenance costs, and insurance, and the bit of fuel costs associated with weekend rides. Since I couldn’t justify the new Tesla payment by giving up the Chally alone, I thought I’d throw the bike on the pile too, and the math started to work out. When all was said and done, it would only cost me 20% more for the P90DL, and…the S85 would actually “save” us about 20%. Yes, you read that right, “save” us money. Ignore the quotes.
Practicing My Pitch
Now that my magical spreadsheet popped out numbers that supported my inane assertion that buying an expensive luxury car could save us money, I was ready to work that same magic on my wife.
I racked and stacked all my car-related information: obscure specs on the Teslas, insurance quotes, fuel cost details, sexy car pictures, spreadsheet scenarios, repair receipts, and got it all squared away in my 3-ring binder with tabs and a comprehensive table of contents. I had gone back to a few of my sales books and took down diligent notes. I put together a solid rebuttal section for my binder with points and counter points. I even looked up a few Sun Tzu quotes for inspiration. I rallied the troops, circled the wagons, practiced my elevator pitch, and got ready to hunker down and convince my wife that buying a Tesla was a no-lose proposition. I mean, a Tesla could save us an average of 20% in transportation-related costs every month, and a P90DL would only cost a measly 20% more. It would be foolish not to do it. I was going to push this over the finish line and quietly speed off into the future in the Tesla of her choosing. It was time to throw down. I was ready.
Pitch Perfect
I had all my materials bundled up in my arms as I walked into the room my wife was working in. I had my binder, supplemental sheets, pictures, and laptop if I needed it to do the math on the fly. I was ready to dazzle her with everything I found. We sat down, and I started on my pitch…” It was a chilly February day in the Winter of 2004 when Elon Musk joined a scrappy outfit called Tesla. Who knew that they would one day turn the automotive world upside down” …her eyes rolled intently as I tried to finish the first part of my compelling 10-minute intro that I rehearsed all morning. I said, ok, got it, I’ll cut to the chase.
I started explaining the spreadsheet with the costs for the Chally, Triumph, and assorted Teslas. I talked about how I had whittled down the list of options from everything in the EV/Hybrid universe down to these two options. We talked about all the different combinations of options again: buying a smaller car and keeping the Chally, selling the Chally and buying a more expensive car, etc. Although she was very reluctant to let the Challenger go, she was ok with a Tesla scenario. Now, we had to discuss all the math stuff.
I showed her all my nerd work, and we discussed the assumptions. She’s smart, so she asked pointed questions like “Could you just spend less on tires for the Chally?” and “Won’t you just go through tires in a Tesla too?” Told ya she was smart. Well, I flipped through my binder to tab 36A under section 14, the rebuttal section and paraphrased the counterpoint for this question. “Yes, that is a possibility. However, the Tesla is a highly advanced vehicle with all-wheel drive and complicated power/torque vectoring management systems that allow it to evenly distribute power to all the wheels at once, minimizing the likelihood of a loss in traction at any point in time.” She just looked at me with that look, you know the one. So I said, “That means it’s way harder to burn out in the Tesla or break the rear tires loose.” She was thinking the math through and all the various vehicle options we discussed. Things were starting to get interesting.
21 More Questions
Her next series of questions centered less on the math and more on just the cars in general. After a surprisingly short series of questions, her focus changed, and she started asking more about the two Teslas specifically. But the questions were simple, direct, and surprising/not surprising. She asked or remarked, “Well, which one of these do you actually want? Do you actually want to get rid of the bike? I don’t mind if you keep it with either Tesla. Which Tesla would you be happier with? Are you really ok with selling the Challenger?” Yeah, I married the right one. She knew I’d keep the new Tesla for as long as possible, so she wasn’t too worried about the cost of either car. She also knew that I would follow through on getting rid of the bike, but she knows I love my bike. So, she wasn’t worried about a bait and switch on the bike. She actually advocated for keeping the bike just if I changed jobs again or ended up in a scenario where I needed that type of transportation again. I told her I’d follow through on the bike and that I was ok with getting rid of the Challenger, especially for the P90DL, because that had been my dream car since they first announced it. She started to sum things up and asked again, very pointedly, “Which Tesla do you want? Not, which one is a better decision, etc. But, which one do you want?”
Major Hurdle Overcome
She asked an excellent question. Clearly, I wanted the P90DL, but I also didn’t want to get rid of the bike or increase our monthly expenses. The P85 was an interesting conundrum because if you can’t have the top dog, why not just save even more money and get a 70 or something similar. She knew me, though, and knew that wasn’t my style. If I had a chance to get the P90DL with all the bells and whistles, I’d take it. If I didn’t, whatever else I got would just be a poor substitute for the next 8-10 years. After the internal dialogue subsided, I answered her question and said, “I want the P90DL. We’ll keep it for a long time, and I think it will be worth the extra expense because I’ll enjoy it more.” She quickly responded and said, “Well, if that will make you happy, then that’s what you should get.”
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